How to Change Your Life by Changing Your Perception

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

situation, husband, shift, perspective, people, seminar, mental faculties, write, relationship, podcast, problem, mindset, week, thinks, life, cleaning, physical form, imagine, belief, notice

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When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change, and that's a quote by Wayne Dyer. Simply by engaging one of these six mental faculties, your perception can shift everything in your life. So you'll want to stick around with me today because I'm going to share with you how to make that mental shift, and how I did that little mental shift that changed everything in my marriage and my relationships. And I'm going to show you how you can do the same thing in any area of your life. The following was recorded in front of a live studio audience at the studio 21 podcast cafe. This is the United Podcast Network.

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Welcome to rat race reboot. I'm your host, Laura Noel. And as a certified coach and former 27 year military leader, each week, I provide bite sized mindset pivots that will help you reset your mind reawaken your spirit and regained your control.

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Hello, everybody, and welcome. I'm excited to be here with you today out today I wanted to talk with you about one of your mental faculties. And if you're with us last week, this is part of a six part series where I'm talking about your six higher mental faculties. And this one in particular perception shifted everything from me in my relationship with my husband, and I want to share the story with you. And then share with you how you can start shifting your perception to change the way you look at things. And then by the same token, those things around you that maybe you're not particularly satisfied with will start to shift as well. So when I started my personal development journey, it was around 2013. And I attended my first Sai basic seminar, which is called personal success Institute. And I was living at the time in Hawaii. And again, I've shared my personal story, I was the type a celeb type A entrepreneurial type of mindset, although I was working in a job at the time, I was serving in the military, but I was very high energy very goal oriented. And you know, always had this insatiable desire to always be achieving more, doing more having more. And so when I got into personal development, I'm not so proud that I started to look around and think, Oh, this person could use this help, or this person needs that. And I find that sometimes when we follow that, that path of personal development, whether we're reading the book, and we're really excited about it, we start to look at people around us through a different lens, like the self evolved kind of lens, and then we think, oh, if they would do this, then everything would be better. Or if they would change, then our relationship would be better. And so I was about to have a really eye opening moment. So I always would argue with my husband about some of the silly petty things that maybe some of you argue about with your significant other, but like cleaning the house and doing the little odds and ends things and sharing kind of the wealth or responsibility of living together and having a home together. And at the time, I was, you know, going through grad school, you know, I had so many things over the years taking care of my dad, who was not doing well, terminally ill, leading different organizations, I was stretched to the max all the time. And that insatiable desire to always be achieving more, doing more, having more buying more, was driven by this inner belief about myself that I wasn't good enough. I wasn't smart enough. I wasn't thin enough. I wasn't talented enough, whatever the case of enoughness you get the picture. And so my husband and I would,

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you know, start our Saturday morning, and I was maybe doing homework or still working on the weekend, of course, because that's what I did. And he started cleaning the house and he's running the vacuum cleaner, singing a happy tune doing his thing. And then I would start to make up the story in my head. I I bet he thinks I'm lazy. I bet he thinks I'm not doing enough. Oh my god, how could he think that? I mean, I'm taking care of my dad. And yes, he's helping me too. And I'm going to school and I'm in charge of this, that and the other thing, and I'm working on all these things, and I'm, you know, working on the weekend. How could he think that about me, and then I would say something to him about cleaning the house. You know, you could wait to do that until later I would help you and I had an attitude about it. And then it would start in

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argument and, you know, truth be told how he felt about me if he was thinking those things were really none of my business unless he wanted to make it known. Okay, so fast forward and I go to this event. And it's a three day seminar. And it's like a self awareness kind of experiential seminar where you're really just peeling back the layers of the onion about yourself, and what makes you tick. And I did the seminar on Friday, all day, all day on Saturday, and Sunday, I came home from the seminar. And I noticed that my husband had vacuumed the house and cleaned the house. And as soon as I walked in the door, I said, Hey, baby, thanks for vacuuming and he went, you bet. I'm like, That's weird. That never happened before. And then a couple days later, I was doing one of those Beachbody workouts, the T 25. workout. And I'm like, you know, Shaun T's workout. And I'm like, going back and forth and jumping from side to side. And it was in this room that had this like kind of brown carpet. And what I didn't notice is my dog got sick on the brown carpet. And I went, and I stepped. And then I said, Ah, and I threw my shoes outside on the patio, and I just cleaned it up. And my husband goes, What's wrong? And I said, Oh, the dog got sick in the carpet, and I stepped on it. It's all over my shoes. And he goes, Yeah, I know, I clean them off for you.

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Okay, so things started shifting what I noticed in our relationship, and I thought, My gosh, I went to this personal development seminar, and my husband changed. He didn't change, I changed, I changed my perspective, and how I was seeing him, and how I was seeing his contribution to our household. And because I changed the way I saw him and our situation. And I shifted my perspective, the way I responded to him, shifted, I wasn't in reaction mode, I wasn't reacting based on my deep internal belief of not being enough, or I bet he thinks I'm lazy, I wasn't coming from that space anymore. I just shifted my perception and my perspective, to gratitude, and towards seeing him as being a loving and helpful husband, which that is the truth. But when we are run by our paradigms, which is are a multitude of beliefs that are stored in our subconscious mind, and many of those beliefs, we're not even aware that we have most of our behavior, just as a reminder, from previous episodes, most of our behavior is habitual 96 to 98% of all of our behavior is habitual. And it's run by this operating system, our paradigm that's in our subconscious mind. So I didn't realize it at the time. But the lens through which I was seeing the world was through my paradigm of being lazy, or not being good enough, you know, where do those paradigms come from? Well, they come from generation to generation, they come from our ancestors, through what we see, and what we create meaning from over the course of our life, particularly before we're the age of six herself. So I was in autopilot. And I was kind of having knee jerk reactions to these things around me, because I never took the time to engage my mental faculties and really do anything about it. So that shifted everything for us in our relationship. I mean, there were times where our relationship was really strained. And I thought it was him. And I'm, you know, true transparency here. It wasn't him, it was me. Now, you know, sometimes people are actually in strained relationships, you know, what it takes two people to, to have a successful relationship. But it takes really, it takes one person willing to change their perspective and take a look at themselves, not with the intent of changing the other person, but with the intent of just changing yourself. When you do that, you set up a different energy around you, and that causes people to respond differently to you. And it'll seem like magic, but it's not. It's just how your mind works, and how your energy works. So I just kind of want to go through some of the steps that I went through so that you can implement it in your own life and give you a little bit of an exercise that you can work on. Whether you're watching this live or listening to this live and you're seated and you have a notebook. I always like to have that handy. That's how you're gonna get the most out of our sessions together. Think of this as your own private coaching session. Okay? It's less than 20 minutes every week and you can spend that time really peeling back the layers of the onion and really creating a tremendous impact in your life and

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For the lives of those around you, but so I want you to think about a situation where you're not getting the results that you want. And so maybe it's in, you're having the same argument similar to me the same argument every week, no, week in, week out, and it's just getting old, you're tired of hearing the same old hits. Or maybe it's a result that you are working toward, and you're not happy with those results. So I want you to write that situation down. And the way it is the way you perceive it, now the things that you think are happening, and then

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get the problem outside of yourself. That's the whole purpose for writing it down. And so one easy way to shift your perspective and see that situation from another perspective is a tip that was given to me by my mentor, Bob Proctor. And I love this and it's so effective. So take that situation or that problem, get it outside of you write it down on an index, index card or a piece of paper, write it down for the way it is. And then imagine you're sitting at your, you know, your dinner table, or a coffee table. And imagine that you have some people you admire and respect sitting with you at the table, and push that piece of paper over across from you to somebody that maybe has a great relationship or has wonderful perspective and you'd like to get their point of view on this. How would they see that problem or situation so now you're taking the problem, you're taking it away and removing it from yourself because it doesn't belong to you? It's not the truth. And you're just imagine what that person would say about your situation. So Bob Proctor, he would write his situation out that problem, and he would imagine, okay, Earl Nightingale is sitting across from me, what would Earl say about this? How would he look at the situation? What would Napoleon Hill thing? What would Sandi Gallagher think, and then from there, he would kind of write these different perspectives as if he was them. And then he had a bunch of different ideas and how he could look at the situation. Again, I'm going to read this quote, again, because it's so good. When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. And that is true. So I want you to try that today. Write it down, get the problem outside of you. Pretend that you're sitting across and around with your people you admire and respect and energetically ask for their perspective. And then write down what you come up with, I guarantee when you start to change the way you look at people doesn't matter what it is, they're going to start responding differently to you. And it's going to seem like magic. And it's not it's how your mind and it's how your energy works. So I want to set you up for success. And I want to bring you in that space right now. But before we do that, know that this is a six part series. This is part two of our six part series. And we're going to be talking about another one of our mental faculties next week, called your imagination, it's something that we don't tap into enough. And we don't really seem to value enough in our culture. And I really want to help you leverage that to really tap into your creativity. So you're gonna want to stick around and join us next week for our podcast for our next episode. But let's get into our mindset and start taking inspired action. I end every episode with this little exercise. So I want you to just get comfortable where you are, of course, unless you're driving, then come back to this later, we're going to just spend three minutes getting connected with something that you want to do or have actually think about this exercise. bring to mind that situation where you're not creating the results you want. And we'll get some music started in the background right now. So just sit with your feet flat, firmly planted on the ground, take a deep inhale through your nose, and exhale slowly and completely through your mouth.

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Take another deep inhale

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and exhale,

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releasing any tension that you might be holding on to

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and take one last inhale through the nose,

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hold it

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and then exhale slowly and completely.

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And now that you have that situation or that relationship or that dynamic,

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in your mind's eye, I want you to think about

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what you would rather see happen in that circumstance or such

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Imagine it unfolding exactly the way you want it to unfold.

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Now, I want you to imagine

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that you are sitting in a boardroom,

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all by yourself.

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And you're sitting at the head of your table.

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And I want you to imagine

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that people start coming into your board room one by one.

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And you start to notice that

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with each person, once you get clear on seeing their facial features and their form, you start to notice their people you admire and respect.

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And some of these people might be living today.

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And others might be people you've read about who are no longer with us in their bodily form, in their physical form.

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But imagine these people are here to help you to help you problem solve, and help you come up with creative solutions.

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And you see them take their place at this table with you seated at the head.

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Imagine that they're giving you perspective on this situation.

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So I just want you to close your eyes. And I'm going to be quiet for a moment here too.

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And just listen to the feedback they're giving you.

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And as you have some ahavas

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write them down.

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Welcome back, I hope you were able to get some nice downloads of inspiration and perspective. Again, I want you to join us next week, because we're going to dive into another one of your God given gifts, your mental faculties, your imagination, I'm going to teach you how to leverage that and tap into your creativity. If you've enjoyed these episodes so far, and if you're loving what you're hearing, I would love to have your feedback and I do read it. And actually if you would give us a review and follow us on whatever platform you listen to your podcast on. I would appreciate that it also helps the algorithm so that other people you feel would benefit from this information know about this podcast. So go on to rat race reboot.com Subscribe to our news love letter. And if you haven't already, download the six mindset changing techniques for a more fulfilled life to get you started. And remember, everything is created twice, first in your imagination, and then in physical form. Next week.

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The views and opinions expressed by the hosts guests or callers of this program do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the studio 21 podcast cafe, the United Podcast Network, its partners or affiliates.